Pause. Create Time for the Important.
E133: Rest & Recap 19 - The Grief Series GOX-LHR-YYZ-NYC
The Trick about Time
Time is malleable. PAUSE. Create a pocket of time for the someone or something that is important to you.
Rest element 19: The important over the urgent
Ponder a way around the excuses. Save a few minutes in your day for what is most meaningful - the important over the urgent. Time refuses to stand still while we figure out groceries and car pool. P-A-U-S-E. Take a minute to rediscover the people and projects that mean the most to you. I am grateful I got to spend the past four months with my mother.
This post started from a rocking chair in Goa, continued at LHR airport in London, and edited at YYZ airport in Toronto. Finally polished and published from home before heading to NYC.
** Meetups? In NYC April 3-4. DM me **
These recent six editions have certainly detoured for the core themes of Climate and Future of Work. But understanding the cycle of life and death plays a pivotal part in Raising Future Ready Leaders. Separation and transitions are necessary 21st-century skills. As is the counter-intuitive practice of reflecting and looking back as a way of preparing for and jumping ahead to the future.
[To the 13 newest members of Tribe Tilt, welcome to the “Rest & Recap” editions. Every 7th edition, we pause, advocate for proactively programming in a rest break (21st century life hack) and reflect on the direction of the past weeks. We are looking for patterns and searching for learning. (Tell me more about the Rest & Recap edition1)]
Recap: Digest of issues 127 - 132
21st-CENTURY SKILLS in this cycle: Yes. This cycle of seven deals strongly with grief. But I hope it also talks about three other topics that are crucial to a young leader-in-the-making:
Understanding what is importance to you. Create time to focus on what is most important, without getting distracted by what is urgent.
The value of relationships. Both personal (my mother and siblings), and what a robust community brings in the way of support.
Using frameworks/traditions as a harness when transitioning in the middle of uncertainty. (h/t
for clarifying that thinking)
Speaking of community, I have been coddled, enveloped and overwhelmed with the love and support from so many relatives, readers and Tribe Tilt members. I hope to pay forward all this love and kindness.
Tribe Tilt has many budding writers. I'd frequently share your posts with my mom. She was a word-smith at heart and was captivated by your diverse, high-quality thoughts, skillfully spun to land on the line in such perfect formation. We'd smile at each other after a great sentence, especially when it was someone young2. It restored our faith that the world is in good hands when people find the courage to publish their ideas.
RIP Mama
Dateline: Goa, India Angela by name, angel by nature Eulogy Our mother, Angela, had planned to leave Goa on February 28. We all expected it would be by plane. Her soul, however, charted a different flight plan. It seemed that she decided she wanted to once again visit this beautiful church, home of Mae de Deus Saibinni who has been a daily source of solace…
From
: If “The life you live is the lesson you teach” your mom achieved tenure a long time ago and had a huge student- body.
The Soulful Sound of the Bells
Dateline: Goa, India And the bells tolled Our mother’s passing came suddenly. I was getting ready to let her go. I had expected many more days and conversations with her. I’d expected to spend Mother’s Day in the UK with her. But she died in Goa. Suddenly. And had a very village funeral.
From
: the sound of those bells.I really appreciate your encouragement to write the eulogy now. I actually started one when my dad had a major medical procedure last year, really as a way to help me process what was happening but I was silently judging myself as I wrote it. Thanks for making me feel not so weird about it
Grief Comes In Waves
Dateline: Goa, India Pray for us now and at the hour of our death. Some observations from this past week: Grief is circular It comes crashing, like waves hitting the beach. Sometimes it pounds, incessantly. At other times it just floats in, lapping around one’s ankles like an ever-present gentle lull.
From
: Your writing is making me reflect about the relationship I have with my family. We're in a bit of a rough patch right now, but your writing has been reminding me about what truly matters.
I’ll like you forever. I’ll love you for always.
As long as I am living, my mommy you’ll be.
— Robert Munsch “Love You Forever”
Take the long view: The Care-EcoSystem & Longevity
FUTURE OF WORK/21st-CENTURY SKILLS: If we are playing the long game on the Future of Work (as this newsletter is prone to do), then these two editions started poking at some underlying opportunities for us to imagine and create a better Future of Work (FoW):
The Care Equation that Indra Nooyi also touches on in her book My Life in Full. As more working individuals find themselves caring for aging relatives and/or children, how do we re-envision work to support them? Financially, with flexibility, and by keeping them vibrantly engaged in the work eco-system.
Longevity. “longevity, not old age, because building a world where the majority of people thrive in old age requires attention to the entire life span. Research shows clearly that education, exercise, nutritional habits, financial decisions, and social choices early in life have substantial implications for quality of life at advanced ages.” [https://longevity.stanford.edu/about/]
Take a Minute. Do Something For Yourself.
Dateline: Goa, India “Have you taken a minute, and done something for yourself?” “Have you had a glass of water, or taken a wee?” my sister asks. “Stop. Do it now. Then come back and care for me.” I pause - and realize she is right. I’d been on my way to the loo when I realized we needed to replenish the liquid handsoap. As I grabbed that out of the cup…
From
(Awake to Racism) - … of giving to your family, but they need you for the long haul, so I'm happy to hear messages to TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF too
Anatomy of a Carer - Part I
Dateline: Goa, India My daughter asked me what life lessons and observations stuck out from these past few weeks. Two, in particular, seemed worth sharing broadly: I’d been noticing how my sister prepared herself for caring for my mother. Do I want to age? Or do I want to thrive in longevity?
From
: "If you haven’t yet been a carer, as a parent or of a parent, you may be one within 20 years." that's a truth bomb right there. Something I wouldn't have been able to see / predict in my shortsighted vision.
Once upon a time, in a universe a million light years away, I was presenting my book at the Goa Literature Festival. An invitation to enjoy how words twist and turn!
A World of Word Acrobats
Dateline: Goa, India Who knew words could twist and turn like that? That they could hover in the air, then slip through the silks, graze the ground, then trapeze back into the heavens. I was surrounded by literati and linguists and poets who perform gymnastics and acrobatics with their words. Heaven! It was the Goa Arts and Literary Festival (GALF), and I…
Thank you for joining our community Tribe Tilt. We believe in the best of humanity - connecting people, sharing ideas, and exploring thoughts respectfully. We support each other. We believe we can make a difference to the people and places that are precious to us. And that the best idea can come from anyone, anywhere, at any time. Thank you for joining with your curiosity which we welcome.
Is this your first visit to Tilt the Future? Come join our Tribe Tilt by hitting this button below:
Wishing you and all those you love a wonderful season of joy, peace and recovery.
Stay healthy. From there all else becomes possible.
Karena
Dateline: India, UK, Canada
The Rest editions offer a break - like a 7th-inning stretch - for me and our Tribe. It's a chance for learning consolidation (a 21st-century skill). https://tiltthefuture.substack.com/i/85450996/what-is-a-rest-edition
Some of the many that made my mother smile with their ingenuity, puns and word-smithing
, and many more
Oof, the important over the urgent. This hits. I feel so much urgency all the time, too much.
Much love to you, Karena 💙